Sorry, I’m chiming in after one-third of August has already passed us by.
And in three more weeks, two-thirds of 2018 would have passed us by, too. That’s wild, isn’t it? At least to me, it is. The clock is grounded in quicksand but the calendar pages fly off into the distance.
That’s enough of that sort of sentimental sappy nonsense, though. Onto what I wanted to bring up in this post already, right?
Partial Explanation of an Unintentional Hiatus
Unfortunately, I’ve been taking a lot of breaks this year since around May. There are a few reasons, but I guess I should just talk about the personal ones.
Essentially, it hit me that I’m just a blogger. All of a sudden I was reminded of my current position again and again. I’m not an important critic by a long shot. Not that I deserve to be one but that just sunk in for me multiple times. Maybe a long time ago I thought I could make money by writing. But being jerked around by other “professional” websites have soured me on the idea.
“Write for us for free”
“We’re gonna keep you waiting for a month before going back on our word since you’re really a nobody”
Stuff like that has really hurt my motivation, I guess. It’s not like I keep things professional around here, but I wanted to think I’m a go-getter. But since I’ve settled for being a casual blogger, I’ve unintentionally became very lax in regards to publishing posts.
Also it just feels bad to post when I’m behind on other people’s posts. Is that just me? Am I being weird for wanting to read and interact with other bloggers’ content while also struggling to make time to uphold this fickle expectation of mind? Am I strange for resenting people who don’t do that? Maybe I’m a hypocrite. Maybe I’m not all there and this isn’t a valid complaint at all. I don’t know.
There’s a lot of whining that I can channel into other posts in the future, so I’ll cut this short for now.
Increased Focus on Yuri Visual Novels
Most of you probably come to this forsaken blog for the anime content. But I also really care about yuri visual novels. I’ve been neglecting this side of my blog for a long while now.
And I just feel like there’s currently a shortage when it comes to coverage of contemporary yuri visual novels. Sure, there are other blogs out there that have a long list of reviews for older yuri VNs. But they ain’t really covering the newer ones. There are also some blogs who mention upcoming contemporary yuri visual novels in monthly or so posts without actually, you know, playing and reviewing them.
So I’m going to try to step up and fill this void. Hopefully I can review at least two yuri visual novels a month, but, um, no promises.
A Slow-down for Seasonal Anime Content
I’m… just not really interested in doing episode reviews anymore. I gave it a shot last season and I just called it quits even though I was covering two very good shows.
It’s also hard for me to really read most episode reviews these days. That’s all on me, guys and girls. Sorry about that. If I had more time then maybe things wouldn’t be like this. But even reading blog posts have an innate hierarchy. I’m sure some of you have already clicked away from this post before even reaching this particular point since I’m boring you with long-winded sentences and meaningless drivel.
Be that as it may, I still want to write about seasonal anime when I can. I’ll just have to let inspiration strike me as usual. As it stands, however, I’m not feeling particularly inspired and I’m on the fence regarding doing a Mideseason Musing for the current Summer 2018 anime season. I’ve been putting out those sort of posts for a while now, but I might opt out of doing one for this season. Sorry about that.
Furthermore, I’m sort of not feeling doing series reviews for seasonal shows anymore? I might pick and choose my favourites, but I don’t know. I really don’t know anything at all right now. Everything is very confusing even though I’m putting out words and pretending that I’ve got something to say.
Rambling about Regular Scheduling
I’m lying here. It’s not really that regular. But I’m going to set a quota of at least 3 posts a week.
I know some of my fellow anime bloggers like to point out that I’m being very weird about the whole quota thing. They argue that I’m setting myself up for failure by trying to force a schedule of sorts.
Perhaps they’re right. But a good friend theorized, back in January 2018, that I might have a solid year if I adhered to a schedule of sorts since I tend to just disappear and leave people hanging.
While the former has been true to an extent, the latter rings like a clear bell atop a tall tower. It’s because I lack structure in my own life. I live like a degenerate, sleep at weird hours like I’m an university student who has given up on passing his classes, and lack an overarching drive or goal. I overshare and probably push people away because I am too stupid to leave out all of the TMI details. The fact that I’m coming to terms with the fact that writing is likely not going to how I pay the bills doesn’t help.
I don’t know. If I’m allowed to pull back the veil like I’ve been doing throughout this entire post, then I guess I want to say it feels good to be overly honest. Presenting myself as a flawed person sits better with me instead of pretending to be some goody-goody.
With that being said, I don’t think humans are incapable of change. It’s too easy to sit on my haunches and blame everyone else around me without doing self-reflection. So hopefully I don’t do that. I’ll try not to, at least.
That’s all, folks.
Hopefully the rest of August is good to you.